When I show people the girls scrapbooks, I usually get this response:
“Wow, how on earth do you find the time?”
I suppose I could answer back in one of three ways.
I could simply ask “How on earth do you not?”
Not necessarily scrapbooking. But something, anything that provides you with a creative outlet. For me, creativity is life. If I could not express it in some way, I would be a machine, going about my day just for the sake of going about my day. That is not a life I want.
I could be practical. Talk about how Bal does the whole night time routine. Which allows me time to scrapbook (or write, blog, edit photos, even read). Yes, at the expense of the dishes or sweeping but that can just as easily be done in the morning while I prepare breakfast. I think many people do not function this way. The chores must be done first so they are relaxed enough to enjoy their creative endeavour. I operate opposite to that. Creating first, allows me to be relaxed enough to do the chores. Though great for my soul, lousy for the housework granted.
Which leads me to the deeper reason I am able to find the time. It all has to do with perfection (or more aptly, the lack thereof). Creativity is flow, imagination, freedom. Kids know this best. They ignore the lines, do not notice borders (thus the lovely purple markers on my Mexican table top.)
Somewhere along the way, this idea of ‘the perfect …’ enters our minds. The perfect house/wedding/job/husband/art/life. Only the thing is, I do not have the perfect anything if you go by the list of expectations either I or society has created. So can I be happy, joyful even, without this perfection? Damn rights I can.
Which is why the borders of my scrapbook are cut crooked, the pictures glued on tilted. Why my blog posts are sometimes scattered. Why some days my photos do not turn out at all. If I spent any more time trying to make things ‘perfect’, I would no longer be living my life, I would be going through the motions. Wasting valuable time for a goal that is fruitless. Long ago I realized that by letting go of perfection, there is more time and space to create. That creative process is my passion, not the finished product itself.
For me, creativity is flow. If I am writing, my photography is better. If I am taking photos, my day is brighter. If I am scrapbooking, my sanity is saner. When I do not find the time, that is when life is not working for me. That is when I am easily frustrated and annoyed. That is when the world feels like it is against me. But give me a moment to frame a shot or an hour to formulate a blog post, and life feels good. I feel good.
I think we all have this sort of feeling don’t we? We all have something we need to do to feel ourselves. Some people play sports, or sing, play musical instruments, run, paint, meditate, build, cook… Oh sure, none of which is as dorky as scrapbooking but you all do what you do for yourselves, don’t you?!
At the end of the day, I suppose I should just answer as truthfully as I can. So ask me again,
“How do you find the time?”
I find the time, because I have to.
*To prove my point I suppose, I am posting this post even though I’m not sure any of it makes sense. It is top of my head ramblings that could be the start of something profound or just simply bullshit. I am not sure which yet. If nothing else, it is a great excuse not to do the housework though!*