Hippopotamuses (Hippopotami?) are funny.
Just ask Brennyn:
I didn’t realize this until it came to my attention that I, myself, was awfully Hippo-like.
What did the hippo get when he started exercising every day?
What did the hippo get when he stopped shaving?
What do you call a hippo who thinks he’s sick?
What jungle animal can you put in a trance?
Then I saw this and just about peed myself:
I was attempting to highlight the really funny parts of this article for those of you with short attention spans. However, it is all freakin funny. I kept in my bolds, bold with italics and bold with italics in red solely because it was too funny to change back.
A hippopotamus has swallowed a dwarf in a circus accident in northern Thailand. “A dwarf, nicknamed Od, died when he bounced sideways from a trampoline and was swallowed by a yawning hippopotamus, which was waiting to appear in the next act,” the Pattaya Mail reported. “Vets on the scene said Hilda the Hippo had a gag reflex which automatically caused her to swallow.” The vets said it was the first time the hefty vegetarian had ever eaten a circus performer. “Unfortunately, the 1000 plus spectators continued to applaud wildly until common sense dictated there had been a tragic mistake. Police said the trampoline has been sent for forensic analysis.“
Oh shit, that is too funny. Rumour has it this is an Urban Legend but I am going to stand by this story as real. Totally plausible. I mean, seriously, how can you not believe a sideways trampolining dwarf falling into a yawning hippo? Totally real.
Which is when Brennyn looks over exclaiming: