This is Kaya ‘racing’ on her Norco run bike. They are geared for 2-4 year olds and the idea is that instead of tricycle to training wheels to bicycle, they can start on the run bike (no pedals- just push and go) and go straight to a regular bike without the training wheels. Kaya started walking tentatively on her ‘run’ bike. Then ventured into going a bit faster. Soon she was coasting for longer and longer periods. She has already achieved balance. This ‘race’ is a complete gongshow of 2-10 year olds on bikes of all sizes and types where nobody wins but everyone does including us parents who can’t stop laughing at the chaos and mayhem that is pure FUN! Sure, many of us moms (and a few kids) had a moment of fear but we all quickly get over it.
I have a memory of myself learning to ride a bicycle. I had encountered a few falls and was completely pissed at my mom who, I was fairly certain, was entirely to blame for the falls, my lack of balance, the weather, you name it. I have no idea how old I was. I feel old in my memory. Too old to just be getting rid of training wheels but too young to be so bitchy at my mom already. At any rate, I told my mom to leave. She tried to watch from the porch. I told her to go inside. I did not want, nor need, an audience. I would do it on my own. And I did. Eventually. After a few more falls with no one to blame. My lesson? Achieving balance takes practice. Nothing more, nothing less.
I am still practicing.
This past year has been an exercise in life balance. Starting, running, growing a business, raising a toddler, maintaining a household, working on my relationship, fun with friends, following my passions (writing, photography, travel), growing a baby… Some things I managed some of the time. Some things did not happen at all. Sometimes my life was wildly unbalanced. Often, my life was wildly unbalanced.
Which is why I, along with my business partner, decided to sell our business after one year in operation. It was an amazing experience. Entrepreneurship is a unique and fulfilling endeavor but it is also one that takes up a ton of time. An overwhelming amount of time if you want success and reward. Time that we could neither find the passion nor energy to put forth while trying to have equally as much success and reward in our families and community. Clearly, it became apparent to both of us, that at this stage of our lives our family comes first. We were not able to equally distribute the time needed for both. Many can. Many do. We could not. Did not.
So on our one year anniversary, an offer to buy came through. They requested the closing date be June, 25th, coincidentally my due date. It all seemed very fated and meant to be. My lawyer was prepared to bring the final papers to sign up to the hospital but June 25th arrived and I was able to sign at the lawyers office (thankfully- can you imagine signing legal documents inbetween contractions? Comical!) Once that was done, I felt the lightest I had felt in a year (yes, even with my 40 extra pounds!) No regrets. Not for any of it. For as a genius of a man once wrote:
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.” -Albert Einstein
So on I ride. To the next phase of my life. Adding to our family and bringing back some of those things I lost along the way. Much like it feels getting back on your bike after a long absence with the wind blowing by as you pedal faster and faster until you are entirely comfortable with knowing how to do this and you lift your hands in freedom, fun, and that blissful state of Balance.