Hearts Mean Love

I have never bought into Valentine’s day. Cheesy box chocolates, forced roses, and expensive dinners with far too high of expectations. As a couple, we have never really celebrated Valentines Day. I think I made a vulgur anti-valentines day card for him once and there may have been a bottle of wine over a scrabble game another time.

But times change.

Children arrive. Children go to daycare. Daycare’s celebrate EVERYTHING.

So it is that on Thursday Feb 12th at 9pm, this mommy dashes to Walmart to find cards for Kaya’s daycare class the next day. Apparently, other people, lots and lots of other people, do celebrate this day. Because the only cards left are Bratz (aren’t they banished now?), a very grown up set of Transformers, and one last box of Hello Kitty. I grab the latter and leave. Once home, I turn on Grey’s Anatomy (I don’t know why I bother), open the box (I don’t know why I bother) and write 24 times, ‘Love Kaya’ (I don’t know why I am bothering). The cards are pathetic. Cheap, barely there paper. I remember them as cards when I was young. Real card stock with cutesy sayings and a lot of hearts. They are now flimsy, small pieces of paper with trademarked cartoons all over them. That is all. Well, that is all on Feb 12th at 9pm at any rate.

The most memorable valentines I have ever received (please note: memorable, not special) was a torn piece of notebook paper. It was written in pencil, had a mis-shaped heart drawn on it and said “I have a crush on you! Love Bryan” I was in grade 5 probably and I was both appalled and gleeful at this secret note. Appalled because I didn’t like this boy at all. He was not ‘cool’ nor ‘cute’ (okay, neither was I). But I was still secretly joyful too. A boy liked me! (heeheeheehee… and carry on with a fit-full of giddy giggles for whatever may be appropriate in a 10 year old’s mind) It goes without saying that I acted like a complete baffoon whenever this boy came around for the rest of the school year. Nothing ever came out of it. I didn’t like him people. But I sure liked that he liked me.

Anyways, Grade 5 passed and onto Grade 6. It is only then, almost a year later, that I was at a pajama party (these things are evil) and one of my ‘friends’ confessed to having written the note herself. She just wanted to see what my reaction would be. She thought it was funny. She didn’t know that she was RUINING MY SELF-ESTEEM FOR THE REST OF MY TEENAGE EXISTENCE! But I forgive her. Really, I do. Truth be known I wasn’t the greatest friend either. In grade 4 I visited her house only because she lived next door to Roddy Evans. Now there was a boy worthy of a crush. Ahhhh, Roddy Evans. Whatever happened to you?

Back to the present. Kaya shared her Valentines. She got many in return. But quite a few kids did not have any to give too. That makes me happy. And when I think of her first Valentines of really, sort-of, understanding I will think of her little friend giving her a big. loveable hug when we arrived to daycare in the morning. Not the pieces of paper headed straight to recycling.

***

That's Funny

Kaya’s Valentines. I like this one because Kaya loves to say right now “That’s Fun!” or “That’s Funny!”. And I have to say, it is really fun to have a child who now knows a good funny when she sees it. Like eating ice or jumping around the room as a family ‘making noise’ or a seal chasing it’s tail or farting.

Oh, and by the way, that is not a massacre of blood on the Valentines. It is pasta. Because eating throwing noodles to the dog, then conning mommy for a cuddles only to lunge at the valentines and running away, well, that is funny!

***

We are at the store.

“What’s that mommy?” asking even while knowing the answer.

“Those are hearts.”

“Hearts mean Love mommy.”

And I do not know why but this melts (actually swells) my heart.

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