Dear Air Canada,

It’s a new year so I’m being all cliché and attempting to be all zen and ‘present’. But Air Canada irks my soul. Here are 2 letters. Both I mean wholeheartedly.

Letter #1

Dear Air Canada president and CEO, Montie Brewer,

Your picture at that link is very pretty. I can only assume that is taken the day Westjet CEO, Clive Beddoe, stepped down over charges of corporate spying. Lord knows what he could have been spying though. Pretzels vs Bits n’ Bites?

Despite all that prettiness and smiles, can I just say please, that you suck ass. You don’t think so? Well then, you can kiss mine.

Your miserable, cantankerous staff (at every single level by the way) should be locked in an undersized, filled to capacity aircraft, in the middle of a freezing tarmac for 12 hours, alone. And by alone, I mean alone only with other AC employees. Paying $6 for every bottle of sanity (ehem- liquor), cafeteria sludge (ehem- lunch tray), and nut-nector doily (ehem- ejaculate-filled blanket). Then please have them phone your own customer service and see how sane they can stay after infinite waiting on hold listening to the overtly cheery but really a slap-in-the-face greeting, “Welcome to Air Canada! Have a Happy Holiday!” followed by ‘calming’ elevator music that makes you wish for a real phone so you could wrap a phone cord around your neck to end what can only be described as PURE, UNADULTERATED, MISERY. Hell, while your at it could you please replay “Just for Laughs” over and over again while keeping the Fasten Seatbelt Sign On.

At this point you may encounter a brawl. Definitely some hair mussing (“No!” I can hear the flight attendants crying now, “Anything but the hair!!!”) I must warn you, there may even be no survivors.

But that’s okay eh Montie? What with all your customers disappearing (*hint*- See all those happy people filling up Westjet terminals? I know it’s hard to recognize them what with all those smiles and luggage, but those used to be your customers), it’s either death or mass lay-offs for your staff. Looks better for you if it’s death I suppose. But may I suggest a new motto? One for all, all for one as they say. Go ahead, join them in that plane. I know you want to…

Sincerely,
A dreamer

Letter #2

Dear Air Canada president and CEO, Montie Brewer,

I suppose I am considered one of the ‘lucky’ ones.

I was not trapped in an aircraft for up to 12 hours.
I was not forced to sleep on filthy airport carpet.
I did make it to my family for Christmas (courtesy of a last minute Westjet flight purchased by my father)
My luggage did not get lost or go missing.
I had a place to spend the 14 hour ‘delay’ in my flight, instead of loitering an airport with a 2 year old.

For all of those things I am grateful. But am I happy with my experience? Not the slightest. I am your customer and I deserve more.

I deserve to be informed and updated immediately (as do your staff by the way, none of whom seemed to know anything at any time)
I deserve to be treated with respect.
I deserve honesty.
I deserve to be able to talk to somebody in an efficient and timely manner.
I deserve an explanation.
I deserve a sense of humour. Hell, even just sense would do.

What I got were lies, dismissals, contempt, waiting, rolled eyes, excuses (after excuse after excuse after excuse…) and disrespect.
What I got from your staff is what I can only presume is the only thing they know. The only thing they have learned from you.

Swallow your pride Montie. Hire a Westjet owner (Hey, aren’t they all owners? Sweet, you have a ton of qualified people to choose from then!) to train you and your staff. I can assure you, you, your staff and any customer big enough to give you another shot will be the better for it.

Sincerely,
A customer not at all big enough.

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2 thoughts on “Dear Air Canada,

  1. I wholeheartedly am with you regarding Air Canada’s abysmal service. International flights are just as bad. How about an entertainment system that totally didn’t work for the first 3 hours. Then it kind of worked except all announcements came on through the headphones at maximum volume. I think I may have suffered some hearing loss. Attendants did not look happy, and looked a bit sloppy. All were over the age of 50 it seemed, and the lady in my aisle was hugely overweight, had spills on the front of her uniform and couldn’t bend down to pick up litter in the aisle. I literally kicked two bottles aside to get to the toilet where the cupboard hadn’t been closed and swung open and knocked me in the head. Shall I go on? I booked my seat this summer but when I went to check in, they said the flight was overbooked and I flew on stand-by. I am pregnant and need to go to the toilet twice as often as regular people; I showed up 3 hours early to request an aisle seat. In the end I was given a middle seat. Argh. And do you ever remember a safetly speel about emergency exits etc before landing? That really made me nervous! ~ Stacy

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