Enough Already

We have got it figured out! This baby making thing.

I had been using ovulation calculators the past few months so even amongst various stall tactics (see previous posts) I did always know when we were supposed to be creating life (having the sex, boinking, whatever…)

But now I’m serious. So I have graduated to the Deluxe Full-Colour Ovulation Calendar now. It’s still easy. I plug in my last start date of menstruation, my average length of menstrual cycle and my luteal phase (whatever that is- 14 is the average so I stick with it). Most calculators then give me the dates of ovulation. But this super-dooper swanky model gives me my very own calendar, complete with colour coded days of the month! Easy for both myself and Bal to understand:

White blocks- no sex necessary but open and free for fun only.

Red blocks- menstruating so chocolate and back rubs required. Now dammit!

Light Green- could possibly catch some sperm right now, but could not, so is it worth doing it now if it takes away from more viable green* later? Hmmmmm….
(*viable green doesn’t make much sense I know, but it made me think of Kermit the Frogs sperm and that is funny!)

Dark Green- Do it! Do it now! Do it again!

It’s like paint-by-numbers, only sex-by-colours. We can do this!

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